My name is Cleetis Vincent, I served in Vietnam from October 69 to May 71
mostly in Cantho,
RVN. I was assigned to the 235th Attack Helicopter
Company and was part of the 307th
Combat Aviation Battalion. We had three units that were
combined using their manpower and
equipment to maintain the aircraft electronics for
the 307th CAB our call sign was
"PHANTOM AVIONICS"
I believed in the United States and was proud to served in
Vietnam, without question. Like most
of my brothers that served in Vietnam I was 19 years old.
I was sent to a place half way around
the world and was told to free the South Vietnamese from
the communist countries that were
invading them. Without question once again
I believed.
My family and friends did not like the idea that from
time to time I was being shot at, and as a
matter of fact I did not like it very much either. I did
however, learn to survive the only way I
knew how by using drugs and alcohol. I had used alcohol in
high school and knew what it would
do for me. The army also must have known that alcohol
worked for me because one of the first
things I remembered is being issued a ration card for
alcohol. At some point in my tour the
alcohol stopped working and I found drugs. I found all
kinds of cheap drugs in Vietnam, grass,
heroin, opium, acid and speed and they all worked to hide
the fear of the unknown. It was not
long and I was hooked on that stuff.
I was told that the habit I had in Vietnam would have
cost me a small fortune in the states and
that scared me. I out of desperation, not knowing him I
asked God to help me and in May of
71, I returned to my home. I was not the same man that had
left for Vietnam 18 months earlier.
My eyes had looked upon death and destruction, within my
own country there was a war, I had
seen man at his worst.
I was hated by my country, my family and by myself for the
things that I had done in the name of
freedom. I ran and hid in a bottle for 21 years. I told
myself that Vietnam did not affect me and
that I did not have a problem. The fact is that I held a
lot of guilt that I was not in the jungle
fighting and that I had returned alive this
made me feel less than.
I have searched this world and longed for peace but was
not able to find it. The problem is that
I was looking for peace in the bottom of a bottle and it
was not there. My family grew very
tired of the anger, the fear of not knowing, and told me
to either get help, or leave. Once again
out of desperation, I asked God to help
me.
God removed from me, the desire to drink and I have not
had a drink in many years. I however
was still searching for peace I was still fighting the
war and the guilt in my mind and in my heart.
There was something wrong, something was missing in my
life. Once again out of desperation, I
asked God to help me.
One day a friend, knowing that I was searching shared
that Jesus had taken a bullet for me
almost two thousand years ago then asked me some
questions. He asked if I believed that Jesus
had died on the cross for my sins. I told him YES and
then we prayed. This was in May of
1998
TODAY I AM AT PEACE
I do not believe for one second that I am special or any
different. I do believe, however, that
there are a lot of my brothers and sisters in hospitals,
prisons and in the cemetery as a result of
the drugs and alcohol.
THIS INSANITY MUST STOP.
I had to learn some of very important things when I
accepted the Lord as my savior. I learned
that I had to forgive everyone as God forgives me.
Forgiveness is a double-edged sword, by
this I mean you must learn to forgive, to be forgiven. I
also learned that God does in fact love
me and has been with me all of my
life.
